Tuesday, September 30, 2008

File Under Messy

In my natural state, I am not an organized human being. In general I am one of those people that "knows where everything is" but whose life makes you want to call TLC. When I came back from vacation I learned that just because I personally know where everything is it doesn't mean that its the best operating system for one that is working in, you know...Corporate America or whatever.

This is part of a larger trend in my life, not only am I disorganized but because I approach every task that I am confronted with as a RACE, important details often go unnoticed. As a young kid my handwriting and my art projects were ALWAYS the ugliest in the class - every painting ended up brown. The part of my brain that cared about things like that (you know, staying in the lines, staying organized and staying on top of things) did not turn on until about...well like two years ago.

Luckily as I get older I realize this about myself. I have had to re-learn how to read directions because 9 times out of 10 I will miss one small but very important step. But what is really annoying is when I literally OBSESS over every detail of something- I tell myself, Schuman, You are totally going to fuck this up so what you need to do is 1. Slow down and 2. Read the god damn directions all the way through for once. It is when I do these things that I have almost an entire day full of pride - PRIDE I SAY, in a job well done. I think to myself, wow, if this is what being organized is like sign me up!

It is after this day of pride that I eventually come to the realization that I totally forgot one key part of the task that I so obsessed over. That saying "A stitch in time saves nine" no longer applies, because if I had rushed through what I was doing to begin with, I would naturally forget something, but could go back and fix it and still be within the time frame that I was in when I "slowed down and took my time".

This is the most frustrating thing ever and try as I might I can't seem to find a way to categorize this problem as "My Parent's Fault".