Friday, May 16, 2008

Hi. I'm Allie and...I'm the dirty kid.

No family with dogs is problem free. For awhile we took our dogs to the community "dog run" until we realized that it was flea infested. Then we dropped a Petco nuke that pretty much killed every flea within a ten mile radius and we have been flea free ever since. But now we have a new problem, a problem that I have no experience with nor do I care to have experience with: ticks.

Yeah. Disgusting.

So we have found a couple on the dogs- three total and they were each so gross I couldn't even handle looking at them, let alone take them off- I let Jon do that.

(the story is about to take an even more unfortunate turn)

I was at work. and I was chatting with my friend Courtney on AIM and working on a couple of things and I very casually, in fact I don't even recall having an itch, touched my left shoulder. And there was a little something there, I could feel, I figured it was probably lint or something. I brushed at it to get it off and it was then I realized that whatever this thing was it was stuck to my skin. and holy fucking shit its a TICK. and I am wildlife.

FREAKING OUT I grabbed at it and I threw it off. Onto the floor of my cubicle. and for some reason I sort of forgot about it for a second, assuming it was dead. But was it dead? No, it was not dead, I see it scrunched in the carpet, alive, wiggling its 6 trillion legs. ewwwww. So I dig the ball of my foot into it and the mother fucker just wont die. I do the unthinkable. I get a kleenex and I actually.grab.at.the.bug.and.squish.it. YUUUCCCKKKK I have the creepy crawlies just thinking about it. I threw it in my trash can and allowed myself to move on with a job well done. Traumatized, but moved on.

But was it dead? No, it was not dead, I see it making its way to the top of the tissue, the only thing in the tiny trash can, with a sort of can do conviction that I'd like to see in more humans to be frank. But what am I going to do now? Pull it out? Squish it again? No fucking way. so I put more tissue on it. and pushed the trashcan a little further away.

I can tell you with 100% certainty that that bug was not dead at that point. I glimpsed in and saw it, but when I came back from lunch it was gone. Vanished back to hell from whence it came.

I think the moral of the story is:
1. Don't go in my cubicle.
2. Don't take no shit from no bugs.

And yeah, we're taking care of the bug problem, thanks.